| Why is it so hard to ask for help? In our professional lives, when we are confused or overwhelmed, it can be very hard to admit that we need help or that we don’t know how to do something. This is often tied to “Imposter Syndrome.” We THINK that if we ask for clarification, or admit that we are unsure of something, then someone might think we are a fraud. We fear judgment, being demoted or even losing our jobs. In our personal lives, we don’t ask for help because we think it’s a sign of weakness. Whether it is a physical task or an emotional need, we fear rejection or disappointment. Someone might say no, or it might not be done the way we like it, so we just resort to doing everything ourselves. Women, in particular, are often afraid to ask for help, because society once dictated that it was their role to maintain the household—cook, clean, and raise the children. But even when we started to have our own careers, this antiquated expectation was still baked into our psyches, and lingered in some societies too. So, we learned to “do it all ourselves,” and then suffer in silence. NOT asking for help is NOT a winning strategy. Not asking for help leads to burnout and resentment, which can lead to physical, mental, or emotional breakdowns. This is true for both men and women. The thing is that if you are a long-suffering-lone-warrior, then people are probably accustomed to you juggling it all. And because you are SO adept at making everyone else’s life easier and meeting everyone else’s needs first, no one thinks YOU need any help. It’s not too late to break this cycle. Whether it is help with picking up the kids, unloading the dishwasher, getting a tutorial on some new software, or just needing someone to talk to about your feelings, you simply need to start by asking. And since Rome was not built in a day, do not wait until you are at your wit’s end to start this “practice.” Just remember, there are people who WANT to help YOU. So, if you are a “do it all yourself-er,” and feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, then let me help you. Schedule your free consultation with me here. Happy Wednesday! xo, Jackie |
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